Sen. Nay if you are for corns, listen to me: 4. (SENSITIVE.)

Walking all day, in very hot weather, in a pair of shoes far too tight both in length and breadth :-corns on every toe.

Tea. There you beat me, to be sure ;-but it is the only triumph you will have, and so make the most of it. Beat what follows, if you can:

5. (T.)

When you have trusted your foot on a frozen' rut-the ice proving treacherous, and bedding you in slush, to the hip.

6. (T.)

Walking through a boundless field of fresh ploughed clayland; and carrying home, at each foot, an undesired sample of the soil, of about ten or twelve pounds weight.

Ned Tes. Ah! this is, as Dryden says

"A trifling sum of misery

New added to the foot of thy account!"--

7. (S.)

Stooping, tearing, floundering, and bleeding your way through a boggy, briary copse, with here and there a rushy pool, which takes you by surprise; so that you are more and møre entangled and engulfed as you advance, till you are, after all, necessitated to turn back, and encore all your sufferings; and so emerge at last, looking like a half murdered beggar:Ned Tes. "Quem circum, limus niger, et deformis arundo, tardâque palus inamabilis undâ Alligat, et novies Sticks interfusa coercent." Virg.

...........

8. (T.)

Walking obliquely up a steep hill, when the ground is what the vulgar call greasy.

Ned Tes. Sad work!" Labitur et labetur !”→→→

Hor.

9. (T.)

Feeling your foot slidder over the back of a toad which you took for a stepping stone, in your dark evening walk"Pressit humi nitens, trepidusque repentè refugit !" In like manner, crushing snails, beetles, slugs, &c. whether you will or not.

Tes. Bad enough, Sir, bad enough ;-but this, and all the specimens of bad footing we have yet mentioned are carpeting, compared with what follows, as you'll soon confess :

10. (T.)

While you are out with a walking party, after heavy rains→→→ one shoe suddenly sucked off by the boggy clay; and then, in making a long and desperate stretch, (which fails,) with the hope of recovering it, leaving the other in the same predicament: the second stage of ruin is that of standing, or rather tottering, in blank despair,with both feet planted, ancle deep, in the quagmire.—The last (I had almost said the dying) scene of the tragedy-that of deliberately cramming first one, and then the other clogged polluted foot into its choked up shoe, after having scavengered your hands and gloves in slaving to drag up each, separately, out of its deep bed, and in this state proceeding on your walk-is too dreadful for representation. The crown of the catastrophe is, that each of the party floundering in his, or her, own gulf, is utterly disabled from assisting, or being assisted, by the rest.

Sen. "O, horrible! O, horrible! most horrible!" If, however, it may afford you any consolation, under the recollection of a calamity so dreadful, to hear an accurate description of it from the master hand of Tacitus, attend, while I recite it: "Miscetur ope

rantiumclamor cunctapariter adversa-locus uligine profundâ, idem ad gradum instabilis, procedentibus lubricus; corpora neque librare inter undas poterant. ................Non vox, et mutui hortatus juvabant : nihil strenuus ab ignavo, sapiens a prudenti, consilia a casu differre; cuncta pari violentiâ involvebantur !"*_ and now, my friend, let me relieve your mind, by a meaner, though by no means a tolerable misery.

11. (S.)

Pushing through the very narrow path of a very long field of very high corn, immediately after a very heavy rain:nankeens.

Tes. Talking of rain

12. (T.)

Setting out, on a fine morning, for a review-and, on your arrival at the ground, violent rain coming on, and continuing without one moment's intermission during the whole of the spectacle; just at the close of which, the sun peeps out from his hiding place, and laughs in your face.

Sen. So much for a wet review; but I can more than match you with a dry one; ecce signum :

* Confusion and clamour prevail among the labouring victims-all things conspiring equally against them; the place a deep swamp, treacherous to the foot, and more and more slippery as they advance; neither could they balance their bodies amidst the boggy marsh. . . . .The voice of mutual encourageIment was heard in vain-All distinction lost between the strenuous and the tardy, the wise and the weak, circumspec. tion and casualty;-all were indiscriminately involved in the same overpowering calamity!

13. (S.)

Attending, on foot, a review of cavalry, on a deep sandy plain, in a furious wind; hich ushers the dust into your eyes from every quarter of the compass to which you turn for refuge-not to mention the costume of a Miller, in which the said wind and dust agree that you shall appear.

It was at just such a review, I doubt not, that poor Young was inspired with the following most remarkable lines:

"then each atom,

Asserting its indisputable right

To dance, would form an universe of dust."

Night Thoughts, N. 9, or, The Consolation.

14. (T:)

Ploughing up your newly rolled gravel walk, by walking over, or rather sinking into it, after a soaking torrent of rain.

Sen. Nothing can be more pitiable!--but having now sufficiently defiled ourselves with dust and mire, suppose we pass to some of the less ignoble Miseries of the country? I will shew you the way:

15. (S.)

While walking with others, in a line, through a narrow path, being perpetually addressed by the lady immediately before you, who, although she never turns her head in speaking, and a roaring wind, from behind, flies away with every, syllable as it is uttered, seems to consider you as provokingly stupid for making her repeat her words twenty times over.

16. (S.)

The flaccidity of mind with which you attempt to flog yourself up into an inclination to work in your garden, fer the sake of exercise:

"Ligonibus duris humum

Exhauriebat, ingemens laboribus."

Hor.

Tes. Nay, there are worse things about a garden than that, I can tell you:

17. (T.)

On paying a visit to your garden in the morning for the purpose of regaling your eyes and nose with the choice ripe fruit with which it had abounded the day before, finding that the whole produce of every tree and bush has been carefully gathered in the night.

18. (S.)

The delights of hay time! as follows:- After having cut down every foot of grass upon your grounds, on the most solemn assurances of the Barometer that there is nothing to fear; after having dragged the whole neighbourhood for every man, woman, and child, that loye or money could procure, and thrust a rake, or a pitchfork into the hand of every servant in your family, from the housekeeper to the scullion; after having long overlooked and animated their busy labours, and seen the exuberant produce turned and re-turned under a smiling sun, till every blade is as dry as a bone, and as sweet as a rose; after having exultingly counted one rising haycock after another, and drawn to the spot every seizable horse and cart, all now standing in readiness to carry home the vegetable treasure, as fast as it can be piled; at such a golden moment as this, Mr. Testy, to see volume upou volume of black, heavy clouds suddenly rising, and advancing in frowning columns, from the southwest; as if the sun had taken half the Zodiac-from Leo to Aquarius-at a leap :-they halt-they muster directly over bead ;-at the signal of a thunder clap, they pour down their contents with a steady perpendicular discharge, and the assault is continued, without a moment's pause, till every meadow is completely got under, and the