But the foft tear in Pity's eye

Outshines the diamond's brightest beams; And the sweet blush of Modesty

More beauteous than the ruby seems.

ON THE SOCIETY FOR THE SUPPRESSION OF VICE,

A vice suppressor is a cur, that wags
His tail at finery, and barks at rags.

ON CONTENT.

It is not youth can give content,
Nor is it wealth can fee;
It is a dower from Heaven sent,
Tho' not to thee or me.

It is not in the Monarch's Crown,
Tho' he'd give millions for't;
It dwells not in his Lordship's frown,
Nor waits on him to Court.

It is not in a coach and six;
It is not in a garter;
'Tis not in love nor politics,
But 'tis in Hodge the Carter.

ON A WORTHLESS PAIR.

From Martial.

PAIR'D in wedlock, pair'd in life :
Husband suited to thy wife :

Worthless thou, and worthless she ;

Strange it is ye can't agree!

ON A MAN THAT WAS DROWNED.

A man being drown'd,

Was ne'er again found,

"Sure he's gone the way of all flesh,"

Then another did reply,

"Sir, that I do deny,

Sure he's gone the way of all fish."

THE RELIGION OF AN EPICURE.

Whose God is his Belly.'

Here's my religion, Demas cry'd,
And to his breast his hand apply'd.
Oh no, said Marcus with a frown,
It lies a little lower down.

ON TWO VERY UNEQUAL LINES

WRITTEN

BY

A

TALLOW-CHANDLER.

Just like the candles on his shelves,
His two dull lines the chandler mixes :
The first out-metes the longest twelves;
The latter scarce exceeds his sixes.

ON A DANDY.

They say, my friend, that you admire
Yourself with all a lover's fire.
Men who possess what they desire,
Like you, are happy fellows;

But you can boast one pleasure more,
While blest with all that you adore,
That no one will be jealous.
I i

A BAD COLD.

There is a mistake, tho' the saying is old,
To hear a man tell you he has a bad cold;
We must drop the saying, though long it has stood,
For I never have heard of a cold that was good.

THE LIAR.

Tom hates a liar! thus we see,
Two of a trade can ne'er agree.

THE COTTAGER AND HIS LANDLORD.

A Peasant, to his Lord, paid yearly court,
Presenting pippins, of so rich a sort
That he, displeased to have a part alone,
Removed the tree, that all might be his own.
The tree, two old to travel, though before
So fruitful, wither'd, and would yield no more;
The squire perceiving all his labour void,
Cursed his own pains, so foolishly employ'd :
And "Oh," he cried, "that I had lived content
With tribute, small indeed, but kindly meant!
My av'rice has expensive proved to me,
Has cost me both my pippins, and my tree."

Cowper.

A WIDOW'S TEARS.

Cecilia her dear husband lost,

She wept, she wail'd, she tore her hair;
A female friend who loved her most,

Would visit her in her despair.

But she surprised her at her glass,
Admiring a sweet smiling face :

"How," said she, "does this come to pass?

No mark of sorrow can I trace."

"You come too late," the widow cried,
"I was indeed to grief a prey;
But unavailing tears have dried,—
You should have seen me yesterday."

THE APRIL-FOOL.

"To-day," said Dick, "is April-day, And though so mighty wise you be, A bet whate'er you like I'll lay,

Ere night I'll make a fool of thee!" "A fool, I may be it is true;

But Dick," cried Tom, " ne'er be afraid; No man can make a fool of you,

For you're a fool already made."

NEW WAY TO PAY OLD DEBTS.

I had a friend, I fondly thought,
I lent him money without measure,
Repayment vainly I besought,

I lost my friend, I lost my treasure.

But as a balance for this wrong,
To ease me of domestic strife,
And free me from a vicious tongue,
He kindly stole away my wife.

BATH AND BRISTOL.

At a public dinner, in the town-hall of Bath, to which several of the
Bristol Corporation were invited, a dispute arose respecting the an-
tiquity and comparative respectability of the rival cities.
The ar-
gument for some time ran in favour of the Bristolians, but was at
length turned against them by a good humoured, but satirical Al-
derman, who silenced the angry disputants, by speaking the follow-
ing impromptu.

King Bladud, once, perceiv'd his hogs
A wallowing in those steaming bogs,
From whence arise salubrious springs,
Twice honour'd by the best of kings.
He drove them hence, in mighty wrath,
And built the stately town of BATH :-
The Hogs, thus banished by their Prince,
Have lived in BRISTOL ever since.

GIBBON'S POLITICAL VERSATILITY.

In 1779, Mr. Gibbon, the Historian, was appointed one of the "Lords of Trade and Plantations, and held that office till its abolition in consequence of Mr. Burke's reform bill. Of his political principles, a slight judgment may be formed from an anecdote, which came to light a few years ago, on the sale of the library of Mr. Fox, who, in the first volume of Mr. Gibbon's history, had written the following memorandum and verses, on the author's accepting a seat at the board of trade.

"The author of this book, upon the delivery of the Spanish rescript in 1779, declared publicly at Brooks's, "That there was no salvation for this country, unless six of the heads of the cabinet council were cut off, and laid upon the tables of the houses of parliament as examples;" and, in less than a fortnight after this declaration, he took an employment under that same cabinet council."

The Verses.

King George in a fright,
Lest Gibbon should write