here be obliged to lay down my pen and conclude

this.

G. A. B.

LETTER CI.

March 13, 17

IN N the' diftrefsful embarraffment to which I was now reduced, I advertised for a place as housekeeper, or attendant upon an elderly lady or gentleman. As I had been accuftomed to a fick-room, was naturally tender to those who are indifpofed, and had acquired much experience from the illneffes of feveral of my friends, as related, I flattered myself I should not fail to please whoever fhould honour me with the acceptance of my offered fervice.

As 1 ftill retained the name of Weft, I imagined that my having been formerly upon the ftage, as well as the character for extravagance which had been imputed to me, would not prove an impediment to my scheme: and if it fhould afterwards be found out, I trusted, that my utility, and unremitted attention in my new employment, would endear me fo much, that it would rather

be

be a circumstance in my favour than disfavour. So fanguine was I of meeting with fuccefs in this application, that all my thoughts were employed in forming an under-plot to my piece; which was to introduce my partner in misfortune (to whom I was now confiderably indebted) into a fimilar fituation. But to our very great mortification, though I frequently repeated the advertisement, to the visible decrease of my nearly exhaufted finances, I found I had nothing to hope from my new adopted scheme. Not a foul ever enquired after the advertiser, notwithstanding she could have rendered herself fo ferviceable.

So much do the news-papers now abound with offered fervices of this kind, that I believe the greatest part of them meet with the fame fate mine did. They, indeed, anfwer more than one good purpose; for in the first place they tend to the increase of his Majefty's revenue, and in the next, to the emoluments of the proprietors of the papers: though this affords very little confolation to the poor wretches who embark their laft fhilling upon the uncertain adventure.

About this time, I renewed an intimacy which had formerly fubfifted between Mrs. Greville and myself; a lady whom my mother had known, G 5

and

and been partial to from a child. This lady had been rendered unfortunate by her union with a man that treated her with the greatest barbarity. She had endeavoured, by the most unremitted induftry, to manage a trifling income left by her fifter Lady Diemar. For, notwithstanding her theatrical talents are univerfally allowed, from fome ftrange circumftances, fhe had been unemployed for feveral feasons. It is a mystery I could never unravel, why this lady fhould be thrown by, while others, with not half her merit, have engagements. The goodness of her heart prevailed over her fcanty circumstances, and she chearfully offered me the little affiftance the could fpare. But as it must be fuppofed from what I have faid, that it could only be a temporary relief, and given at different times it could not extricate me from my difficulties.

I wrote to India to my fon and nephew, but no anfwers could be expected from them for two or three years; and how to fubfift was the labour of my thoughts, My maid was my greatest unhappiness; for as to myself, I had now aċquired a perfect indifference to whatever might befal me; and my mind was more calm than it had ever been fince my early days. This fere

nity

nity was a 'bleffing I had not experienced during the many years I had paffed in folly and diffipation.'

At the conclufion of the feafon, a gentleman, who poffeffes the moft extenfive philanthropy, and to whom I owe repeated obligations, opened a fubfcription for me at Brookes's; but the fummer being too much advanced, and most of the members gone into the country, it did not fuceed equal to his kind intentions. The money arifing from it was barely fufficient to pay a demand which a fevere creditor had fued me for; and what added to the cruelty, was his knowing that the debt was not of my contracting.

The fubfcription, however, was productive of a more fortunate circumftance than the fum received as it affured a perfon, who belongs to the club, of my distress, which he had only slightly heard of from a female friend of mine: and Icannot fufficiently exprefs my gratitude for his repeated affistance. It is with the utmost difficulty I can fo far fupprefs my grateful fenfations, as to keep them from breaking out into public acknowledgments for fo fingular an inftance of benevolence; but I obey the injunction, though with reluctance. The confcioufnefs of poffeffing. a mind fo enlarged, and the pleasures which flow G 6 from

from acts of beneficence will be his reward; and I fhall never forget, that he is a fhining pattern of the most unlimited and exalted humanity.

About this time my patron went abroad; but before he left England, he offered me his farther affiftance. I, however, declined the offer, feeling myfelf already too much obliged; and having some reason to fear his generofity would overleap the bounds of prudence.

And I, in order to keep pace with his fenti.. ments, at this juncture, fell into a very great inconvenience, through the high opinion I entertained of an artful woman, and the confidence I placed in her. So great was my folly upon the occafion, that I blufh at the recollection of it, and am even afhamed to mention it. And this at a time when experience ought to have taught me to be careful; and after the miferies I had fuffered through the duplicity of others, to be upon my guard against the falfe pretenfions of those who defcend to art.

Upon my returning home one day from a friend, whom I had been to inform of my fituation; and as I was indulging my reflections on my folly; on the years I had lived; and on what I ought to have attained, a knowledge of the world;