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December 22, 17I NOW found all my theatrical expectations frustrated. Although, but a few days before, they seemed to be resuming their wonted fplendour, and bid fair to be productive of at least some years of unclouded sunshine, in a moment an envious gloom darkened the prospect. Tranfient, as “ when a fable cloud turns forth her silver lining " to the night," was the flattering hope. But such
lot. I could by no means have wished for an engagement, unless it was on condition of being rein
stated in most of the parts that had been in my pofleffion, together with my quota of new ones; and as to requesting a favour of that kind from Mr. Woodward, I reprobated the very thought.
. I could not for a moment suppose, even had I been so unreasonable as to make such a weak proposal, that a person who knew the value of money fo well as he did, would have consented to have me (to make use of a political phrase) tacked to him by way of dependent.
For notwithstanding friendship is a very fine thing to talk of, very few would prove such devotees to it, as to facrifice a thousand pounds a year upon account of it. As for my own ideas of that facred union, they are so truly romantic, and fo very
unfashionable, that I am almost ashamed to make them known : but I should not think worlds too dear a purchase, for the person towards whom I professed a friendship. I now regretted, more poignantly than before, that I had made Mr. Colman my enemy. Though I deplored his resentment, I acknowledged the justice of it. I have, however, the consolation to add, that from that gentleman's liberal behaviour for some time past, I have every reason to believe his displeasure häs subsided, and that I have the happiness, once
more, to look upon him in the light of a friend,
Upon the third of December I always made a dinner for some friends, in honour of its being the name-day of Comte Haflang. I had accordingly invited some ladies, and his Excellency's Secretary, to dine at my mother's, where I now resided when I came to town.
The evening previous to that day my mother feemed to be indisposed, but as I was in hopes that it was only a slight indisposition, and she herself objected to my putting off the party, I had not done so. When I returned home from paying the usual compliments upon the occasion, I found her in the parlour, much worse than when I left her. Seeing this, I entreated her to permit me to send for advice; which she refused, but consented to return to bed,
As I did not apprehend any real danger from my
mother's illness, good company, joined to good cheer, and good humour, made us laugh rather too loud; when, to our great surprize, she entered the room, in the midst of our festivity, and turning to Mrs. Howe, one of the ladies present, desired her not to raise a mob about the door by her immoderate laughing, As my mother was B 2