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The next a woodcock, and an owl,
I kiss'd a hen behind a hedge.
-Where jealousy is bred,
Horns in the mind are worse than horns on th' head. Old Spencer thus exclaims on it:
O hateful, hellish snake, what fury first
Brought thee from baleful house of Proserpine?
And foster'd up with bitter milk of time.
To dayless dread, and mak’st the living heart,
And feed itself with self-consuming smart:
Of all the passions in the mind, thou vilest art. Michael Drayton, thus sings:
Pale jealousy, child of insatiate love,
Of heart-sick thoughts, and melancholy bred,
By discontent, with deadly poison fed,
A mortal plague, a virtue-drowning flood,
A hellish fire, not quenched but with blood.
Where love doth reign, disturbing jealousy
This carry-tale Several beautiful descriptions are made of this passion by our more modern poets; but as they are more known than the foregoing, I have omitted them, and think in this ancient painting of what Jealousy is, there is horror enough to affright any one from encouraging so dangerous an evil.
To catholicons and quack medicines and nostrums we are on principle averse. Yet the following recommends itself so strongly, partly by its simplicity, and chiefly by the mixture of morality it contains, that we think it worth a page or two of a work that is dedicated to information as well as amusement of the public. That troublesome fellow Gout is extremely addicted to keeping good company, and loves to reside where there are fine markets, fat shambles, and wine, cum multis alies, quæ nunc prescriberi longumst in abundance-All which being the case of Philadelphia-Doctor Tronchin's recipe cannot but meet, among our subscribers, many to whom it will be acceptable. It is infallible, and recommended by the liberal terms of " no cure no pay."
The gout has long been proverbial as the opprobrium medicorum; and every nostrum regular, or irregular, that has been prescribed for its cure, has completely failed. The most judicious of the faculty ondeavour to palliate the evil they cannot conquer; and they trust to the vis medicatriz naturæ, rather than to active or vigorous practice. The candid physician will admit, that his knowledge of the gout, acquired by study and books, is trifling; and that his skill in treating this disease, derived from observation, though the best possible medium of instruction, is rather of negative qualities. We think ourselves happy, therefore, in the favour done us by a correspondent, who has transmitted the translation of a letter from that celebrated French physician, Dr. Tronchin, in which he takes credit for having discovered a complete cure for the gout: and, not willing to keep this remedy secret, we insert it pro bono publico.
Yes, gentle reader! could we more than prescribe—could we actually procure, deliver, and administer, the medicines directed by the doctor, we doubt not, but we should rapidly accumulate the most enormous fortune; wealth would pour in upon us like a torrent: we should literally know no end of our riches. Who, that has experienced the tortures of anxiety, the restless agitation of a mind ill at ease, would not willingly offer a large remuneration for quantum sufficit of the first ingredient only? What would not the ambitious give, whose labours and vigilance have been unremit. tedly directed to accomplish the purposes of aggrandisement, whose incessant activities have terminated in self, and who, while
on intrigues to counteract his rivals, has had intent recourse to maneuvres not credible by ordinary men?- The merchant, who has risked his all, and more than his all, impelled by the desire of gain, at what price would he not purchase that remedy which might dispel his cares? The condition of the man of fashion, and the man of pleasure, with many other members of the great world, Dr. Tronchin describes as almost hopeless: or if the gout which distracts them be curable, they must forego the gratifications which surround them, and place themselves on a level which hitherto they disdain. Seeing then, that the very first ingredient of this recipe is so difficult to be procured genuine, fresh, in full power and virtue; that it is very scarce, and seldom to be obtained pure, we fear that the gout will still continue its ravages among those ranks of the human race, which are usually esteemed the most fortunate. If we dare indulge the hope of its exclusion, it is from the abodes of the sons of poverty; from those who must labour, to support life, who cannot afford to indulge their irregular passions, whose weariness desires nothing so much as to recruit exhausted strength. Those who cannot discern the benevolence of Providence, in alloting this condition to infinitely the greater part of mankind, may, if they please, continue to be dazzled by false appearances: they may dance by the light of that nocturnal meteor of the pool, the ignis fatuus: but for our parts we prefer the heavenly sun, as a more cheerful and efficient luminary. We shall not enter into considerations of the nature and excellence of the other ingredients of this ingenious composition: it is enough that we know them in general to be highly valuable, and, we add, in our judgment, equally efficacious.
DR. TRONCHIN'S REMEDY AGAINST THE GOUT. In the year 1772, a man of letters, still living, M. JouyneauDesloges, being tormented with violent attacks of the gout, was informed that the celebrated doctor Tronchin, physician to the duke of Orleans, had completely cured the prince of that disorder, by only prescribing for him two glasses of honey-water, every morning before breakfast. He wrote to the doctor; and shortly after received the following answer.
“ Paris, 4th June, 1772. “ You are much in the right, sir, not to trust to any secret remedy against the gout. There is but one known to me, by experience; for I had the gout also, but I begin to hope that I shall no Vol. IV.
more be troubled with it. This secret consists in peace of mind, temperance, exercise, and chastity. This course I have advised the duke of Orleans to take; he has followed it, and follows it still, although not quite so exactly as myself. Momentous affairs, and a most delicious table, still encroach now and then on his peace of mind, and on his temperance. On these two points, I have some advantages over him. Heaven has made our lots pretty equal. While it pour's riches and honours on princes, it denies them peace of mind and temperance, which it grants to you and me; such is the true honey-water which will cure you, as it has cured me,
you add to it exercise and chastity. Even if it does not completely remove the disorder, it will make it so tolerable, that you will hardly have cause to complain of it. You may, with the utmost confidence in its harmlessness, distribute my recipe among your friends; and, I believe you too generously minded not to communicate it even to your enemies, should you chance to have any. You will please to observe to them, that wherever people lead an easy, sober, chaste, and active life-and there are still some corners of the earth where those blessings are enjoyed, they are unacquainted with the gout: that offspring of idleness, and of passions! more especially of intemperance, which embraces the quality as well as the quantity of food and drink. Dry frictions, repeated daily, a constant but moderate exercise, regular hours, a sleep of seven hours, peace of mind, and cheerfulness, are the auxiliary means, as I have already said, which I would recommend against the gout. And to return to the duke of Orleans, whose case you did me the honour to mention, the honey-water he uses now and then, is not, properly speaking, intended against the gout; he uses it as a gentle mean to keep his bowels open, and, as better suited to gouty people than cathartics, which he never takes; not once, since I have had the honour of being with him. Formerly he was dosed with such physic once or twice a month, and he was let blood monthly; but this has never been the case during my residence here. By means of the secret I have confided to you, his gout is nearly removed; and his health is so far reestablished that he no longer needs my assistance. Such is, sir, the true state of the case; this is the whole secret, and there is no more in it. From hence we may draw the following moral conclusion, which is well worth our most serious attention; that if peace of mind, temperance, exercise, and chastity, have such good effect on princes, we may, and we ought, to make great 'allowances for them: for it is easier for us, than it is for them, to keep the passions in subjection, to live soberly and chastely. They have an advantage over us only in point of exercise. They have more horses than we can command. If they had not some advantage, who would be a prince? I am much gratified, sir, that the explanation you required, has afforded me the opportunity of assuring you, &c.
MYSTERIES AND MORALITIES.
In one of our earliest numbers, mention was made of the Mysteries and Moralities, which may be considered as constituting the foundation of the drama in the christian countries of Europe. Some have gone so far as to assert, and indeed argue with much ingenuity that they originally came from the East to England--but others have insisted with much more plausible foundation that they were introduced into that island by the Roman conquerors, and they have argued the matter thus:
During the government of the Anglo-Romans in Britain, the pleasures arising from the stage seem to have been pursued with avidity, and, if we may be allowed to judge from the remains of theatres that have been discovered, or from their representations still extant upon medals, to have been very generally adopted.
In Rome, we know that they were at the same period the delight of the people; and we also know, that there are vestiges of them still to be traced in the colonies of Gaul and Iberia. It is probable, that the Roman officers would either amuse themselves with acting plays, as our officers now do in India, or would bring over actors from Rome, as several of our players have visited our Eas. tern territories. But the Roman actors, whether officers, or players by profession, that either visited or settled in Britain, would probably, as in Gaul, derive assistance from the bards, the inferior order of the Druids. For we cannot suppose, that all the bards, without exception, were so completely patriotic as to refuse to exercise their talents to gratify foreign superiors; and we know, too, that then as now, party divided the people of this island, and to party they owed their weakness and subjugation. We must also consider, that it was the policy of the conquerors to blunt in the