swear him, like another infant Hannibal, to eternal hatred against our enemies.-Mean time, having finished our survey of diversions abroad, let us walk in, if you please, and try whether the House has any thing better to shew than the fields.-The first article on my list is Dancing. 17. (S.) Blundering in the figure all the way down a country-dance, with a charming partner, to whom you are a perfect stranger; and who, consequently, knows nothing of you but your awkwardness. Tes. That offence may be forgiven, however;-not so the following: 18. (T.) Entering into the figure of a country-dance with so much spirit, as to force your leg and foot through the muslin drapery of your fair partner. Sen. There I feel for you indeed! Mrs T. (who during this, and a few of the other dialogues, is sitting at work in another part of the room.) "Your feelings," Mr Sensitive!-Deuce take it!" my feelings," if you please; you seem to leave the poor lady, and her ruined petticoat, quite out of the account! Tes. Pho, pho! Mrs T.-the petticoat may be mended again, and there would be an end of that; but nothing short of amputation would satisfy the Lady's vengeance against the leg. However, Madam, I have another dancing distress, in which, I am certain, you will join in your heart, whether you choose to confess it or not: 66 (19.) T. The plagues of that complicated evolution called right hand and left." Ned Tes. "Palantes error certo de tramite pellit; Ille sinistrorsum, hic dextrorsum abit."-HOR. Tes. Again 20. (T.) Being compelled to shift your steps, at every instant, from jig to minuet, and from minuet to jig-time, by the sleepy, drunken, or ignorant blunyour musicians. ders of Ned Tes. Tempora mutantur, et nos mutamur in illis.” Sen. I will now give you a ball-room "Groan," with which nothing in Holbein's "Dance of Death' can stand a moment's comparison : 21. (S.) When you have imprudently cooled yourself with a glass of ice, after dancing very violently, being immediately told by a medical friend, that you have no chance for your life but by continuing the exercise with all your might; then, the state of horror in which you suddenly cry out for " Go to the Devil and shake yourself," or any other such frolicksome tune, and the heart-sinking apprehensions under which you instantly tear down the dance, and keep rousing all the rest of the couples, (who, having taken no ice, can afford to move with less spirit) -incessantly vociferating, as you ramp and gallop along, " Hands across, Sir, for Heaven's sake!"-" Set corners, Ladies, if you have any bowels !"—" Right and left-or I'm a dead man!"-&c. &c. Tes. Why, to you, Sensitive, such a violent remedy must have been almost as bad as the disease; though, to be sure, as your friend the Doctor had described your case as so 5 alarming, it was natural that it: you should try "Non tulit hanc speciem furiatâ mente Choroebus,* * Et sese medium injecit moribundus in agmen.” VIRG. Sen. So much for dancing:-let us examine a few more domestic recreations.-Will Billiards give happiness? Tes. I'll tell you: 22. (T.) Missing your cue at every stroke-("totum nec pertulit ictum,") and this when you are particularly ambitious of shewing your play. Sen. Cards?-I will answer myself: ....... 23. (S.) At the game of Commerce, losing your life in fishing.... for aces, when you had hooked two, and the third had several times nibbled at your bait.-Or 24. (S.) When there is a very rich pool, and you have * A name evidently formed from Chorus, a company outlived all the players but one, he having gone up twice, and you not once-losing all your three lives running. Tes. "Amid such mighty plunder, why exhaust slain ! YOUNG, Or, as Dryden pathetically puts it— "Rich of three souls, he lives all three to waste." Pal. and Arc. Tes. Nay, Commerce is the best game upon the cards; for you may get yourself released, whenever you please.- What say you to the case of a wretch, who detests cards, and whist above all, at which he plays vilely :-under these circumstances, I say, what think you of *Note by the Editor. It must be confessed that this complaint, by inuendo, against her Ladyship, for winning his friend's money, is but too much in harmony with Mr Testy's usual habits of unpoliteness, |