his friend in the pit, biting his nails, and looking towards the stage, in a sort of nothing-to-do-ish way, just as the last parting scene between Jaffier and Belvidera was going on there. I observed (I confess, with regret, for he is one of my favourite pupils) the progress of its victory over Bob's politeness. He first grew attentive, then hummed a tune, then grew attentive again, then took out his toothpick case, then looked at the players in spite of him, then grew serious, then agitated,——till, at last, he was fairly beat out of his ground, and obliged to take shelter behind lady Cockatoo's head, to prevent the disgrace of being absolutely seen weeping.

"But, to return from this digression.The Simulation of indifference in affliction is equally a female as a male accomplishment. On the death of a very, very near relation, a husband, for instance, custom has established a practice, which polite

people have not yet been able to overcome; a lady must stay at home, and play cards for a week or two. But the decease of any one more distant, she is to talk of as a matter of very little moment, except when it happens on the eve of an assembly, a ball, or a ridotto; at such seasons she is allowed to regret it as a very unfortunate accident. This rule of deportment extends to distresses poignant indeed; as, in perfect good-breeding, the fall of a set of Dresden, the spilling of a plate of soup on a new brocade, or even a bad run of cards, is to be borne with as equal a countenance as may be.

Anger, the second passion above enumerated, is to be covered with the same cloak of ease and good manners; injury, if of a deep kind, with professions of esteem and friendship. Thus, though it would be improper to squeeze a gentleman's hand, and call him my dear Sir, or my best friend, when we mean to hit him

a slap on the face, or to throw a bottle at his head; yet it is perfectly consistent with politeness, to show him all those marks of civility and kindness, when we intend to strip him of his fortune at play, to counterplot him at an election, or to seduce his wife. The last mentioned particular should naturally lead to the consideration of jealousy; but on this it is needless to insist, as, among well-bred people, the feeling itself is quite in disuse.

"Love is one of those passions which politeness lays us under a particular obligation to disguise, as the discovery of it to third persons is peculiarly offensive and disagreeable. Therefore, when a man happens to sit by a tolerably handsome girl, for whom he does not care a farthing, he is at liberty to kiss her hand, call her an angel, and tell her he dies for her; but, if he has a real tendre for her, he is to stare in her face with a broad unfeeling look, tell her she looks monstrous ill

this evening, and that her coiffeuse has pinned her cap shockingly awry. From not attending to the practice of this rule amongst people of fashion, the inferior world has been led to imagine, that matrimony with them is a state of indifference or aversion; whereas, in truth, the appearances from which that judgment is formed, are the strongest indications of connubial happiness and affection.

"On the subject of joy, or at least of mirth, that great master of our art, my Lord Chesterfield, has been precise in his directions. He does not allow of laughter at all; by which, however, he is to be understood as only precluding that exercise as a sign, common with the vulgar, of internal satisfaction; it is by no means to be reprobated as a disguise for chagrin, or an engine of wit; it is, indeed, the readiest of all repartees, and will often give a man of fashion the victory over an infe

rior, with every talent, but that of assurance, on his side.

"As the passions and affections, so are the virtues of a polite man to be carefully concealed or disguised. In this particular, our art goes far beyond the rules of philosophers, or the precepts of the Bible; they enjoined men not to boast of their virtues; we teach them to brag of their vices, which is certainly a much sublimer pitch of self-denial. Besides, the merit of disinterestedness lies altogether on our side; the disciples of those antiquated teachers expecting, as they confess, a reward somewhere; our conduct has only the pure consciousness of acting like a man of fashion for its recompence, as we evidently profit nothing by it at present, and the idea of future retribution, were we ever to admit of it, is rather against us."

Such, Mr Mirror, is the substance of one of my lectures, which, I think, promise so much edification to our country,