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freedoms he had used, observed, that, under discussed at this genial meeting, Sir Mungo's standing the Count was a foreigner, he could scheme was brought upon the carpet by his not dispense with appealing to him concerning majesty, who was graciously pleased to ask how an outrage he had suffered from the keeper, his subscription filled ? To this interrogation who, without any regard to his rank or misfore the knight answered, that he met with great tunes, had been base enough to refuse him cre- opposition from a spirit of levity and self-condit for a few necessaries, until he could have a ceit, which seemed to prevail in this generaremittance from his steward in France ; he tion; but that no difficulties should discourage therefore conjured Count Fathom, as a stranger him from persevering in his duty, and he trustand nobleman like himself, to be the messenger ed in God, that, in a very little time, he should of defiance, which he resolved to send to that be able to confute and overthrow the false phis brutal gaoler, that, for the future, he might losophy of the moderns, and to restore the writlearn to make proper distinctions in the exer- ings of Moses to that pre-eminence and veneracise of his function.

tion which is due to an inspired author. He Fathom, who had no inclination to offend spoke of the immortal Newton with infinite this choleric Frenchman, assured him that he contempt, and undertook to extract from the might depend upon his friendship; and, in the Pentateuch a system of chronology which would mean time, prevailed upon him to accept of a ascertain the progress of time since the fourth small supply, in consequence of which he pro- day of the creation to the present hour, with cured a pound of sausages, and joined the rest such exactness, that not one vibration of a penof the company without delay; making a very dulum should be lost! nay, he affirmed that suitable addition to such an assemblage of rari- the perfection of all arts and sciences might be ties. Though his age did not exceed thirty attained by studying these sacred memoirs; and years, his beard, which was of a brindled hue, that he himself did not despair of learning from flowed down, like Aaron's, to his middle: upon them the art of transmuting baser metals into his legs he wore red stockings rolled up over the gold. joint of the knee; his breeches were of blue drab, The chevalier, though he did not pretend to with vellum button-holes, and garters of gold contradict these assertions, was too much atlace; his waistcoat of scarlet ; his coat of rusty tached to his own religion to acquiesce in the black cloth ; his hair, twisted into a ramillie, knight's project of converting the Jews and the hung down to his rump, of the colour of jet; Gentiles to the protestant heresy, which, he and his hat was adorned with a white feather. said, God Almighty would never suffer to

This original had formed many ingenious triumph over the interests of his own holy caschemes to increase the glory and grandeur of tholic church. This objection produced abundFrance, but was discouraged by Cardinal Fleury, ance of altercation between two very unequal who, in all appearance, jealous of his great ta- disputants, and the Frenchman, finding him, lents

, not only rejected his projects, but even self puzzled by the learning of his antagonist, sent him to prison, on pretence of being offend- had recourse to the argumentum ad hominem, ed at his impertinence. Perceiving that, like by laying his hand upon his sword, and declarthe prophet, he had no honour in his own coun- ing that he was ready to lose the last drop of try, he no sooner obtained his release, than he his blood in opposition to such a damnable retired to England, where he was prompted by scheme. his philanthropy to propose an expedient to our Sir Mungo, though in all appearance reduced ministry, which would have saved a vast effue to the last stage of animal existence, no sooner sion of blood and treasure ; this was an agree heard this epithet applied to his plan, than his ment between the Queen of Hungary and the eyes gleamed like lightning; he sprung from late Emperor, to decide their pretensions by a his seat with the agility of a grasshopper, and, single combat ; in which case he offered himself darting himself out at the door like an arrow as the Bavarian champion ; but in this endeac from a bow, re-appeared in a moment with a your he also proved unsuccessful : then, turn- long rusty weapon, which might have been ing his attention to the delights of poetry, he shewn among a collection of rarities as the became so enamoured of the muse, that he ne- sword of Guy Earl of Warwick. This impleglected every other consideration, and she, as ment he brandished over the chevalier's head usual, gradually conducted him to the author's with the dexterity of an old prize-fighter, exnever-failing goal; a place of rest appointed for claiming, in the French language, “ Thou art a all those sinners whom the profane love of poesy profane wretch markeıl out for the vengeance of hath led astray.

Heaven, whose unworthy minister I am; and

here thou shalt fall by the sword of the Lord CHAP. XLI.

and of Gideon.” One quarrel is compromised, and another decide lutation, desired he would accompany him to a

The chevalier, unterrified by this dreadful saed, by unusual arms.

more convenient place; and the world might Anong other topics of conversation that were have been deprived of one or both knights-er

" SIR,

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rant, had not General Macleaver, at the desire our mess whom I can intrust with an affair of
of his majesty, interposed, and found means to this nature."
bring matters to an accommodation.

Fathom, rather than run the risk of disoblig-
In the afternoon the society was visited by ing such a punctilious warrior, after having in
the major's cousin and her daughters, who no vain attempted to dissuade him from his pur-
sooner appeared than they were recognised by pose, undertook to carry the challenge, which
our adventurer; and his acquaintance with was immediately penned in these words:
them renewed in such a manner as alarmed the
delicacy of Captain Minikin, who in the even-
ing repaired to the Count's apartment, and, with “ You have violated my honour, in imposing
a very formal physiognomy, accosted him in upon Mrs Minikin your pretended cousins as
these words: “Sir, i beg pardon for this ina ladies of virtue and reputation ; I therefore de-
trusion; but I come to consult you about an af- mand such satisfaction as a soldier ought to re-
fair in which my honour is concerned ; and a ceive, and expect you will adjust with my friend
soldier without honour, you know, is no better Count Fathom the terms upon which you shall
than a body without a soul. I have always ad- be met by the much-injured
mired that speech of Hotspur, in the first part of

« GOLIAH MINIKIN." Henry the Fourth:

This morceau being sealed and directed, was By Heaven, methinks it were an easy leap, forthwith carried by our adventurer to the To pluck bright Honour from the pale-faced lodgings of the major, who had by this time remoon ;

tired to rest, but, hearing the Count's voice, he Or dive into the bottom of the deep,

got up and opened the door in cuerpo, to the Where fathom-line could never touch the astonishment of Ferdinand, who had never beground,

fore seen such an Herculean figure. He made And pluck up drowned Honour by the locks~" an apology for receiving the Count in his birth

day suit, to which he said he was reduced by “ There is a boldness and ease in the expresa the heat of his constitution, though he might sion, and the images are very picturesque. But, have assigned a more adequate cause, by ownwithout any further preamble ; pray, sir, give ing that his shirt was in the hands of his me leave to ask how long you have been ac- washer-woman; then, shrouding himself in a quainted with those ladies who drank tea with blanket, desired to know what had procured us this afternoon? You'll forgive the ques- him the honour of such an extraordinary visit. tion, sir, when I tell you that Major Macleaver He read the letter with great composure, like a introduced Mrs Minikin to them as to ladies of man accustomed to such intercourse; then, adcharacter, and, I don't know how, sir, I have a dressing himself to the bearer, “I will be after sort of presentiment that my wife has been im- diverting the gentleman (said he), in'any manposed upon. Perhaps I may be mistaken, and ner he shall think proper ; but, by Jesus, this God grant I may

But there was a je ne is no place for such amusements; because, as scai quoy in their behaviour to-day, which be. you well know, my dear Count, if both should gins to alarm my suspicion. Sir, I have no. be killed by the chance of war, neither of us thing but my reputation to depend upon; and will be able to escape, and after the breath is I hope you will excuse me, when I earnestly out of his body, he will make but a sorry exbeg to know what rank they maintain in life.” cuse to his family and friends. But that is no

Fathom, without minding the consequence, concern of mine, and therefore I am ready to told him with a simper, that he knew them to please him in his own way.” be very good-natured ladies, who devoted them- Fathom approved of his remarks, which he selves to the happiness of mankind. This ex- reinforced with sundry considerations to the planation had no sooner escaped from his lips, same purpose, and begged the assistance of the than the captain's face began to glow with in- major's advice, in finding some expedient to dignation, his eyes seemed bursting from their terminate the affair without bloodshed, that no spheres, he swelled to twice his natural dimen- troublesome consequences might ensue either to sions, and, raising himself on his tiptoes, pro- him or to his antagonist, who, in spite of this nounced, in a strain that emulated thunder, overstraining formality, seemed to be a person “ Blood ! sir, you seem to make very light of of worth and good-nature.

« With all my the matter ; but it is no joke to me, i'll assure heart (said the generous Hibernian), I have a you; and Macleaver shall see that I am not to great regard for the little man, and my own be affronted with impunity. Sir, I shall take character is not to seek at this time of day. I it as a singular favour, if you will be the bearer have served a long apprenticeship to fighting, of a billet to him, which I shall write in three as this same carcass can testify, and if he com words : nay, sir, you must give me leave to in- pels me to run him through the body, by my sist upon it, as you are the only gentleman of shoul, I shall do it in a friendly manner."

So saying, he threw aside the blanket, and disorder ; whereas Macleaver, who was a strandisplayed scars and seams innumerable upon ger to all sorts of medicine, by his wry faces his body, which appeared like an old patched and attempts to puke, expressed the utmost ableathern doublet. I remember (proceeded horrence of the smell that invaded his nostrils. this champion), when I was a slave at Algiers, Nevertheless, resolved to hold out to the last Murphy Macmorris and I happened to have extremity, he continued in action until the some difference in the bagnio ; upon which he closet was filled with such an intolerable vabade me turn out. Arra, for what? said I, pour as discomposed the whole economy of his here are no weapons that a gentleman can use, intrails, and compelled him disgorge his and you would not be such a negro as to box breakfast in the face of his opponent, whose like an English carman. After he had puzzled nerves were so disconcerted by this disagreeable himself for some time, he proposed that we and unforeseen discharge, that he fell back into should retire into a corner, and funk one ano- his chair in a swoon, and the major bellowed ther with briinstone, till one of us should give aloud for assistance. The door being opened, out. Accordingly we crammed half a dozen of he ran directly to the window, to inhale the tobacco pipes with sulphur, and, setting foot to fresh air, while the captain, recovering from his foot, began to smoke, and kept a constant fire, fit, complained of Macleaver's unfair proceede until Macmorris dropped down; then I threw ing, and demanded justice of the arbitrators, away my pipe, and taking poor Murphy in my who decided in his favour; and the major, bea anns, What are you dead? (said I), if you ing prevailed upon to ask pardon for having inare dead, speak.' No, by Jesus! (cried he), troduced Mrs Minikin to women of rotten reI an't dead, but I'm speechless.' So he owned putation, the parties were reconciled to each I had obtained the victory, and we were as good other, and peace and concord re-established in friends as ever. Now, if Mr Minikin thinks the mess. proper to put the affair upon the same issue, I Fathom acquired universal applause for his will smoke a pipe of brimstone with him to- discreet and humane conduct upon this occamorrow morning, and if I cry out first, I will sion; and that same afternoon had an opportube after asking pardon for this supposed af- nity of seeing the lady in whose cause he had front."

exerted himself. He was presented to her as Fathom could not help laughing at the pro- the husband's particular friend, and when she posal, to which, however, he objected on ac- understood how much she was indebted to his count of Minikin's delicate constitution, which care and concern for the captain's safety, she might suffer more detriment from breathing in treated him with uncommon marks of distincan atmosphere of sulphur than from the dis- tion; and he found her a genteel well-bred wocharge of a pistol, or the thrust of a small man, not without a good share of personal sword. He therefore suggested another expe- charms, and a well-cultivated understanding. dient in lieu of the sulphur, namely, the gum called assa fætida, which, though abundantly nauseous, could have no effect upon the infirm

CHAP. XLIII. texture of the lieutenant's lungs. This hint being relished by the major, our adventurer re- An unexpected rencounter, and an happy revoluturned to his principal, and having repeated the tion in the affuirs of our Adventurer. other's arguments against the use of mortal instruments, described the succedaneum which he As she did not lodge within the precincts of had concerted with Macleaver. The captain at this garrison, she was one day, after tea, confirst believed the scheme was calculated for sub- ducted to the gate by the captain and the Count, jecting him to the ridicule of his fellow-pri- and just as they approached the turnkey's lodge, soners, and began to storm with great violence; our hero's eyes were struck with the apparition but, by the assurances and address of Fathom, of his old companion Renaldo, son of his benehe was at length reconciled to the plan, and factor and patron, Count de Melvil. What preparations were made on each side for this were the emotions of his soul, when he saw that duel, which was actually smoaked next day, young gentleman enter the prison, and adabout noon, in a small closet, detached from vance towards him, after having spoke to the the challenger’s apartment, and within hearing gaoler ! He never doubted that, being informed of his majesty, and all his court, assembled as of his confinement, he was come to upbraid him witnesses and umpires of the contest.

with his villainy and ingratitude, and he in The combatants, being locked up together, vain endeavoured tɔ recollect himself from that began to ply their engines with great fury, and terror and guilty confusion which his appearit was not long before Captain Minikin per- ance had inspired; when the stranger, lifting ceived he had a manifest advantage over his up his eyes, started back with signs of extreme antagonist. For his organs were familiarized amazement, and, after a considerable pause, exto the effluvia of this drug, which he had fre- claimed, “ Heaven and earth! Sure my eyes quently used in the course of an hypochondriac do not deceive me ! is not your name Fathom ?


It is, it must be my old friend and companion, ing a deep sigh, Alas! my friend (said he), the loss of whom I have so long regretted !" the Count is no more ; and, what aggravates my With these words he ran towards our adven- affliction for the loss of such a father, it was my turer, and, while he clasped him in his arms, misfortune to be under his displeasure at the with all the eagerness of affection, protested time of his death. Had I been present on that that this was one of the happiest days he had melancholy occasion, so well I knew his geever seen.

nerosity and paternal tenderness, that, sure I Ferdinand, who, from this salutation, con- am, he would in his last moments have forgiven cluded himself still in possession of Renaldo's an only son, whose life had been a continual good opinion, was not deficient in expressions effort to render himself worthy of such a parent, of tenderness and joy; he returned his embraces and whose crime was no other than an honourwith equal ardour, the tears trickled down his able passion for the most meritorious of her sex. cheeks, and that perturbation, which proceeded But I was removed at a fatal distance from from conscious perfidy and fear, was mistaken him, and doubtless my conduct must have been by the unsuspecting Hungarian for the sheer invidiously misrepresented. Be that as it will, effects of love, gratitude, and surprise. These my mother has again given her hand in wedfirst transports having subsided, they adjourned lock to Count Trevasi ; by whom I have the to the lodgings of Fathom, who soon re-collect- mortification to be informed, that I am totally ed his spirits and invention so well as to amuse excluded from my father's succession; and I the other with a feigned tale of his having been learn from other quarters, that my sister is bartaken by the French, sent prisoner into Cham- barously treated by this inhuman father-in-law. paigne, froin whence he had written many let. Grant, Heaven, I may soon have an opportuniters to Count Melvil and his son, of whom he ty of expostulating with the tyrant upon that could hear no tidings; of his having contracted subject. an intimacy with a young nobleman of France, So saying, his cheeks glowed, and his eyes who died in the flower of his age, after having, lightened with resentment. Then he thus proin token of friendship, bequeathed to him a ceeded": considerable legacy; by this he had been enabled “My coming hither to-day, was with a view to visit the land of his forefathers in the cha- to visit a poor female relation, from whom I racter of a gentleman, which he had supported yesterday received a letter describing her most with some figure, until he was betrayed into a deplorable situation, and soliciting my assistmisfortune that exhausted his funds, and drove ance: but the turnkey affirms, that there is no him to the spot where he was now found : and such person in the jail; and I was on my way he solemnly declared, that, far from forgetting to consult the keeper, when I was agreeably surthe obligation he owed to Count Melvil, or re- prised with the sight of my dear Fathom.' nouncing the friendship of Renaldo, he had Our adventurer, having wiped from his eyes actually resolved to set out for Germany on his the tears which were produced by the news of return to the house of his patron in the begin- his worthy patron's death, desired to know the ning of the week posterior to that in which he name of that afflicted prisoner in whose behalf had been arrested.

he interested himself so much, and Renaldo Young Melvil, whose own heart had never produced the letter, subscribed your unfortuknown the instigations of fraud, implicitly be- nate cousin Helen Melvil. This pretended relieved the story and protestations of Fathom; lation, after having explained the degree of conand though he would not justify that part of sanguinity which she and the Count stood in to his conduct by which the term of his good fore each other, and occasionally mentioned some tune was abridged, he could not help excusing anecdotes of the family in Scotland, gave him an indiscretion into which he had been hurried to understand, that she had married a merchant by the precipitancy of youth, and the allure- of London, who, by repeated losses in trade, ments of an artful woman : nay, with the ute had been reduced to indigence, and afterwards most warmth of friendship, he undertook to confined in prison, where he then lay a breathwait upon Trapwell, and endeavour to soften less corpse, having left her in the utmost extrehim into some reasonable terms of composition. mity of wretchedness and want, with two young

Fathom seemed to be quite overwhelmed children in the small-pox, and an incurable canwith a deep sense of all his goodness, and af- cer in one of her own breasts. Indeed, the picfected the most eager impatience to know the ture she drew was so moving, and her expresparticulars of Renaldo's fate, since their unhap- sions so sensibly pathetic, that no person, whose py separation, more especially his errand to this heart was not altogether callous, could peruse uncomfortable place, which he should hence it without emotion. Renaldo had sent two forth revere as the providential scene of their guineas by the messenger whom she had reprere-union : nor did he forget to inquire, in the sented as a trusty servant, whose fidelity had most affectionate and dutiful manner, about the been proof against all the distress of her missituation of his noble parents and amiable sister. tress, and he was now arrived, in order to re

At mention of these names, Renaldo, fetch- inforce his bounty.

Fathom, in the consciousness of his own nified his sentiments on this head to the Count, practices, immediately comprehended the scheme who opposed them with unusual obstinacy, as of this letter, and confidently' assured him, that productive of a delay which might be fatal to no such person resided in the prison, or in any his proposal: for which reason he had retired other place : and when his friend applied for in- incognito from his family, and travelled through formation to the keeper, these assurances were sundry states and countries in a disguise, by confirmed; and that stern janitor told him he which he eluded the inquiries of his parents. had been imposed upon by a stale trick, which That, in the course of these peregrinations, was often practised upon strangers by a set of he was captivated by the irresistible charms of sharpers, who make it their business to pick up a young lady, on whose heart he had the good hints of intelligence relating to private families, fortune to make a tender impression : that their upon which they build such superstructures of mutual love had subjected both to many danfraud and imposition.

gers and difficulties, during which they suffered However piqued the young Hungarian might a cruel separation; after the torments of which, be to find himself duped in this manner, he re- he had happily found her in England, where joiced at the occasion which had thrown Fac she now lived entirely cut off from her native thom in his way; and, after having made him country and connexions, and destitute of every a tender of his purse, took his leave, on purpose other resource but his honour, love, and

pro to wait upon Trapwell, who was not quite so tection. And, finally, that he was determined untractable as an enraged cuckold commonly is; to combat his own desires, how violent soever for, by this time, he had accomplished the best they might be, until he should have made some part of his aim, which was to be divorced from suitable provision for the consequences of a his wife, and was fully convinced that the de. stricter union with the mistress of his soul, that fendant was no more than a needy adventurer, he might not, by a precipitate marriage, ruin who in all probability would be released by an the person whom he adored. act of parliament for the benefit of insolvent This end he proposed to attain, by an applidebtors; in which case, he (the plaintiff; would cation to the court of Vienna, which he did not reap no solid advantage from his imprisonment. doubt would have some regard to his own ser.

He therefore listened to the remonstrances of vice and that of his father; and thither he rethe mediator, and, after much canvassing, ao solved to repair with the first opportunity, now greed to discharge the defendant in considera. that he had found a friend with whom he could tion of two hundred pounds, which were imme. intrust the inestimable jewel of his heart. diately paid by Count Melvil, who by this de- He likewise gave our hero to understand, duction was reduced to somewhat less than that he had been eight months in England, thirty.

during which he had lived in a frugal manner, Nevertheless he cheerfully beggared himself that he might not unnecessarily exhaust the in behalf of his friend, for whose release he money he had been able to raise upon his own forthwith obtained an order: and next day our credit; that hitherto he had been obliged to deadventurer, having bid a formal adieu to his fer his departure for Germany, on account of fellows in distress, and in particular to his ma- his attendance upon the mother of his mistress, jesty, for whose restoration his prayers were who was lately dead of sorrow and chagrin; preferred, he quitted the jail, and accompanied and that since he resided in London, he had his deliverer, with all the outward marks of un- often heard of the celebrated Count Fathom, utterable gratitude and esteem.

though he never imagined that his friend FerSurely, if his heart had been made of pene- dinand could be distinguished by that appellatrable stuff, it would have been touched by the tion. circumstances of this redemption : but had not his soul been invincible to all such attacks, these memoirs would possibly never have seen

CHAP. XLIV. the light.

When they arrived at Renaldo's lodgings, Fathom justifies the proverb, What's bred in that young gentleman honoured him with other the bone will never come out of the flesh.proofs of confidence and friendship, by giving him a circumstantial detail of all the adventures Some circumstances of this conversation made in which he had been engaged after Fathom's a deep impression upon the mind of our advendesertion from the imperial camp. He told turer, who nevertheless concealed his emotions him, that immediately after the war was finish- from the knowledge of his friend, and was next ed, his father had pressed him to a very advan- day introduced to that hidden treasure of which tageous match, with which he would have com- Renaldo hud spoke with such rapture and adorplied, though his heart was not at all concerned, ation. It was not without reason he had exe had not he been inflamed with the desire of patiated upon the personal attractions of this seeing the world before he could take any step young lady, whom (for the present) we shall Lowards a settlement for life : that he had sig- call Monimia, a name that implies hier orphan

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